Friday, October 8, 2010

how to treat your minister

Forgot that this Sunday is National Clergy Appreciation Day?

While it may be a big deal for some ministers, it’s not for me. In fact, I tend to rebel against “mandated” days like that. Valentine’s Day and Bosses Day fall in the same category. Who gives a rip? Hallmark’s not my master.

Thus, if you expect me to have a suggestion or two on how to show your appreciation for your pastor, I have nothing to offer. You’re on your own.

But I will offer three general suggestions on how I think pastors would like to be treated year-round. I don’t pretend to speak for all pastors, but suspect that some of them—maybe even many of them—would agree with one or more of these suggestions.

Treat them as people, not just pastors
Readers of this blog know this is a pet peeve of mine. In my experience, Christians have trouble seeing their pastor as anything but a minister. As a result he is often seen only as a resource, not as a person. Because of that, deep conversations and friendships are rare.

I was contacted by an old friend and co-worker from the business world recently and our email conversations were absolutely wonderful. While I’m passionate about what I’m doing, it was great not to read a single mention of ministry. We just caught up with personal stuff and shared a few laughs.

This doesn’t mean that pastors don’t accept their calling, because they do. It’s that they’re more than ministers—they’re human just like you. And that means they have hopes and dreams, as well as struggles.

At the end of his life the Apostle Paul pleaded with Timothy to “come to me quickly.”1 Even though Timothy would undoubtedly help the Apostle to minister, we know from other writings that the two were very close. Taken in context, I believe Paul’s plea to Timothy was for his friendship and companionship just as much as the ministry part.

Pray for (and with) them
This is perhaps the greatest gift you can give to a pastor. I know from experience that when people are praying for me great things happen. Not because of anything I’ve done, but because the Lord’s answering the prayers of those on my behalf.

There’s a woman in my congregation who does more than just pray for me: She prays with me. She makes a habit of calling me periodically to see how I’m doing and to encourage me. And without fail she ends the calls by praying for me right then and there.

She not only prays for me, but with me. While the latter may not be your cup of tea, if it is, give it a try and put an extra bounce in your pastor’s step.

“Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel.”2

Compensate them fairly
While many ministers receive a livable wage and even well beyond, many do not. Many struggle to make ends meet and are left to scramble when it comes to things like health insurance and retirement. Benefits that many of us expect in the secular world are often not there in the ministry world.

I don’t say this to make you feel sorry for pastors, just to be aware that many are not compensated like people in other professions. While sacrifices are to be expected, the financial and emotional toll that it takes on pastors and their families can often be devastating.

The reality is, pastors who are always worried about their personal finances are distracted and unable to minister as effectively as they could be. And while you may not be a decision-maker in your church, I encourage you to do whatever you can to make sure your pastor is compensated fairly.

“The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. For the Scripture says, ‘Do not muzzle the ox while it is treading out the grain,’ and ‘The worker deserves his wages.’"3


So there you have it. National Clergy Appreciation Day? I personally could care less, but if you think it’s really important to your pastor, then buy him a card. Hallmark will love you.

But if you really want to show your appreciation for your pastor—and not just one day a year but year-round—then:

·         Pray for (and with) them
·         Treat them as people, not just pastors
·         Compensate them fairly


1  2 Timothy 4:9
2  Ephesians 6:19
3  1Timothy 5:17-18

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